[VIDEO] I Am Enough

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The more I practiced, the more mental shifts I started to experience.
~ Jeanie Mattina
I was first introduced to yoga practice in 2002 while watching an Oprah show featuring Rodney Yee. I remember all of Oprah’s guests were talking about the benefits of yoga. One woman, in particular, was saying that after she had given birth to twins, yoga had taught her to be more forgiving of her body. More forgiving of her body…what did that even mean? She said, yoga helped her accept her stretch marks, level out her hormone imbalances, and accept her body for what exactly it was…a magnificent piece of work that produced two beautiful babies.
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I did not start my yoga practice at that time. However, I have always had a deep love for fitness. Growing up, I was always riding my bike or swimming with my older sister and brother. My dad has an immense love for water and would take us to the lake where he taught me how to windsurf at age eleven. As a teenager, I started running and as most girls are, I was on a quest to ‘perfect’ my physique. That quest moved into my young adult life – I started weightlifting in my early twenties after my son was born. Less than two years after that, I gave birth to my daughter and started competing in figure, which is a class of physique-exhibition for women. The extreme training and dieting was hard on my body, not to mention my mind – I always had a nagging thought that I was not good enough and I started to pick apart my physique every day, and although I enjoyed working toward the goal of competing, I became overcome with negative thoughts toward my physique and the perfection it lacked. I started looking at food differently – putting it in categories like, ‘bad or good.’ I would feel guilty if I ever strayed from my diet.

Throughout the years, I always had my ‘normal weight’ and my ‘competition weight’ on my brain. I became obsessed with numbers on the scale and body fat percentage and tape measures. Even when I wasn’t competing anymore, I still had those numbers going through my mind. I started to back away from working with weights – my body and mind were tired. But, that little voice ‘you are not really good enough’ was always whispering in my conscience. I started distance running and doing sprint triathlons. I absolutely loved the training, but once again the little voice was there – ‘you should be faster’ or ‘maybe if you dropped five more pounds.’

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My best friend who I ran with always incorporated yoga into her training. I decided to give it a try. The first time I opened the door to Mind Body Flow Yoga studio, Marina was standing right there and with her infectious smile welcomed me. I left that night feeling lighter and more calm, but happy that I had a challenging workout. I started to incorporate yoga into my weekly workout schedule. The instructors at Mind Body Flow Yoga were so kind and helpful. I fell in love with the community – everyone was so friendly and inviting.

The more I practiced, the more mental shifts I started to experience. Through yoga practice, I have been able to see things for how they truly are. On my yoga mat, I have met God. I have forgiven past hurts from relationships, and that little voice full of numbers, scales, and comparisons is now almost silenced. I have been moved to tears with gratitude for the body that the Creator has given to me…maybe that is what being forgiving of your body means.

My journey at Mind Body Flow Yoga is just beginning. I still have doubts about myself and I still have not totally silenced that little voice of discouragement. I signed up to do the teacher training program that’s starting this month, at Mind Body Flow Yoga, and at one point during practice, that little voice said ‘really Jeanie? You can’t even do a handstand.’ I almost opted out because of my discouragement and busy life, but Marina urged me to pray and meditate and reminded me that no time is ever the perfect time. I am grateful that she urged me to give it some more thought. I decided to be a yes for the teacher training, even though I can’t do a handstand yet. 🙂

I am going to keep on this journey, and yes, I will keep on being discouraged at times, and I am sure that annoying little perfectionist voice will whisper some more negative things. But, I also know that I will move forward with each and every practice and one day that will all be completely silenced.

I am so grateful for the Mind Body Flow Yoga community and together we can continue this beautiful imperfect journey.

What is this Pose About?

*If you have any medical concerns, talk with your doctor before practicing yoga.

This is a grounding pose that stretches your arms, wrists, and spine. The resulting shape is a deep toning of the abdomen. Watch Jeanie enter into this asana from Mountain Pose (Tadasana). She will exit the pose and land back in Mountain Pose (Tadasana) as well.

Here are a few things to keep in mind, if you decide to try this pose, or if you have already started to experiment and play around with it.

  • Press your thumbs and index fingers into the floor. Firm your shoulder blades against your back. Spread your collarbones wide.
  • Press your front thighs up toward the ceiling, but resist your tailbone toward the floor as you lengthen it toward the heels. Lift the base of the skull away from the back of the neck and look straight down at the floor, keeping the throat and eyes soft.
  • Hold this pose and stay anywhere from 30 seconds to 1 minute.

Benefits

  • Strengthens the arms, wrists, and spine
  • Tones the abdomen

Caution

  • Avoid this posture if you carpel tunnel syndrome. Consult with your instructor on modifications.
  • Have you tried this pose before? What has been your experience?

Enlist the help of an experienced instructor with Plank Pose if this is your first time trying it.

Have you tried this pose before? What has been your experience?

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